Open Adoption Has...

Given me the opportunity to see things in my children that they have been blessed with through the wonder of genetics! Because we have open adoption's, we know Caleb's beautiful birth mom, and Jonah and Noah's entire birth family. In truth, I feel like we too, have been adopted into their birth families. I love knowing that Noah looks so much like his sister. And Jonah looks so much like their brother, even though as twins, Jonah and Noah don't look very much alike! ;o) I love seeing that Caleb's eyes have the same shape as his birth mom's. And even though I will forever profess that it is love that ties a family together, there is a mystical tie to those with whom we are genetically connected. Open adoption has made it easy for us to connect to those who have written on the slate of our boy's before they were in our arms, and I am ever so thankful to have a bond with those who are such a vital part of who my children are.
Has it always been this way????
No! I must be honest, and share that prior to Caleb's birth, I was completely ignorant about "open adoption". Actually, we had planned on adopting internationally, not necessarily because we felt the Lord leading us there, but primarily because it seemed safer. We could fly to another part of the world, gather our baby in our arms, and fly back home. Far away from anyone who may want to take him away from us. Who may want to take him back. Even when Caleb was born, and we were given the gift of being a part of his journey into the world... I was terrified. Would she change her mind? Would she sign the papers? Or would my dream of motherhood be taken away, once again. The way infertility had thus far robbed me of my greatest desire. At that point, it was all about... Me. Wow... I had so much to learn. (I know, I still do...) It wasn't until I surrendered my desire to the Lord, and took the focus off myself, that I began to feel the joy and freedom in embracing those who were giving me my life's greatest gifts! This was a long process for me, and honestly, I did not 'feel' the joy of openness for awhile. But the more I began to realize that parenting is *GASP* not about me, the easier it was to stand in the corner of the children that I had been blessed with, and build relationships with those who are so much a part of who they are.